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Cut up Maria

[ website | myspazz ]
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Don't you just love goodbyes? [03 Sep 2006|11:09pm]
[ mood | peaceful ]

"The olfactory sense is the sense that most strongly evokes memories of the past...

Well, screw the past.
(That's why I wanna spend my life with you)"

I meant everything I said in my last entry but, despite the derision & contempt, I feel no ill-will towards Marc really.

If it wasn't for him I may well not have my awesome two best friends & certainly would not be living with them. & right now I feel so happy I might just explode.
I feel frustrated & extremely embarrassed by the amount of time I wasted but I am exactly where I would like to be now.

My life is fucking magic.

& today, especially, feels like the beginning of something unimaginably beautiful. I think I deserve a new beginning.

That's why I'm ending this journal. It shall remain as an archive but I will never write in here again.


come tiptoe through the tulips with me...

11 Jumped in Let Go

EVIL! [31 Aug 2006|10:23pm]
David: "If I was J K Rowling, just for a laugh I wouldn't write a seventh book"


:O
3 Jumped in Let Go

Two days! [31 Aug 2006|09:34pm]
[ mood | indescribable ]

akdfjaoifhioahfiozhoaihdioaho!

Let Go

& I feel like some bird of paradise [31 Aug 2006|01:15am]
[ mood | squishy ]

:)

2 Jumped in Let Go

Lovely girl, you're the beauty in my world [29 Aug 2006|02:01am]
[ mood | happy ]

I don't update properly anymore. I need to rectify this.

But right now all I want to say is I am stupidly happy and I love Yoshi stupid amounts.

Stupidity feels pretty damn awesome :D

3 Jumped in Let Go

You are my joy [26 Aug 2006|10:57am]
[ mood | happy ]


4 Jumped in Let Go

[24 Aug 2006|02:21am]
It's nice to feel smug.
1 Jumped in Let Go

Life is time, they teach you growing up [10 Aug 2006|11:58am]
[ mood | enthralled ]

Yesterday I served a beautiful sweet young boy with the most incredible hands. He had only two fingers and a thumb on each. I was fascinated & somehow moved and just wanted to grab them and hold them in mine. But I suppose that could have been construed as a little odd.

2 Jumped in Let Go

[07 Aug 2006|09:15am]
Can anyone give me some help in dealing with a friend with serious depression? (This isn't a "my friend" situation)
I'm doing the best I can but I'm scared because I know so little. This person means the world to me and it absolutely kills me to see them this way.


In other news I just placed my phone in a cup of water so might be without for a while. Not good.
2 Jumped in Let Go

[28 Jul 2006|07:45am]
[ mood | ridiculous ]

I think my life (and the situations I get myself into) would be really depressing if it wasn't so hilarious.

3 Jumped in Let Go

[23 Jul 2006|09:41am]
i don't feel the way i am pretending to feel.
1 Jumped in Let Go

[21 Jul 2006|11:15am]
What wasted unconditional love, on somebody who doesn't believe in the stuff.
4 Jumped in Let Go

Fuck you & your opposite sex. [17 Jul 2006|02:06am]
[ mood | sleepy ]

I think Sarah and I really are the best people ever.

I feel rather man-hating at the moment.
A boy kissed me last night and now I feel really upset and disgusted. I'm so tired of all the bullshit and of having to fight it alone.
However, the rest of the night's activities, followed by a wonderful day with "very beautiful, very wonderful, very sexy" Sarah, more than made up for it. I'm so happy at the moment. I have a job I love, super friends, a lovely house and the sun is shining. I need to stop looking at the thing which makes me sad.

Let Go

Strange how the ears ring after a night of wrong-doing. [10 Jul 2006|07:58am]
[ mood | amused ]

I think the highlight of this weekend's exercise in hilarity has to be my persuading four people to do the bunny hop to death metal in The Gallows. I may just be the most awesome person ever to have lived.

Let Go

So. Work drinks. [09 Jul 2006|10:00am]
[ mood | embarrassed ]

My mind = Tokyo
alcohol = Godzilla.

Let Go

Everything you've ever done wrong is the reason that I'm driven (straight to you) [07 Jul 2006|12:48am]
[ mood | indescribable ]

Today I did something I may very well regret. I feel so incredibly conflicted and a single sheet of paper has unleashed a tsunami of inner turmoil.

I guess sometimes you just have to risk abject humiliation and hurt for that one gleaming chance.

3 Jumped in Let Go

WTF?! [06 Jul 2006|11:39am]
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
9 Jumped in Let Go

[06 Jul 2006|02:29am]
[ mood | tired ]

"Cocaine really is a fashion [censored]'s drug - its status is considered above its hit. It's always seemed like that's a lot of the appeal of the drug. The fact that it's so expensive and decadant, snorting it up through a rolled up twenty or whatever, added to the fact that it generally turns people into egomaniacs. It seems like the drug equivalant of being dressed head to toe in designer gear, a status symbol for yourself."

8 Jumped in Let Go

Nothing but sunshine [30 Jun 2006|02:58pm]
[ mood | bouncy ]

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Right now I feel as smug as an obese man getting some awesome "belly play".
Good.

5 Jumped in Let Go

All relationships are emptying & temporary. [28 Jun 2006|01:15am]
[ mood | touched ]

I had my appraisal at work today. Stuart thinks I am doing brilliantly. I know it probably sounds so insignificant; I'm hardly a high flying entrepeneur, but it means so much to me. For once I have actually been working really hard and it is wonderful to have that recognised. I was so scared (without any real reason) that I was doing really badly and hanging onto my job by the skin of my teeth but apparently I am a model worker.

My place of employment rocks. Today I got the DVD edition of Extraordinary Machine by Fiona Apple for £3.50.

I'm stupidly excited about moving to The Good House and, despite the squalor and missing-Amy-ness, enjoying living with Sarah & David.

Other things are bad and it's something that I think about obsessively but I don't think it merits that level of attention. The days are just packed.

David and I are trying to get hold of an elephant and a donkey. Because if they mate MONEY happens. Good.

2 Jumped in Let Go

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